If I were a fish, animal or fowl, what would I be, and why?

I would be a dragon! It’s the best of both worlds; it’s a cat that can fly! I love all animals, even the ugly ones, but I have always had a special connection with cats. When I was 6, my dad took my brother and me to a nearby neighbor’s house a few miles down the country road we lived on to swim in her pool, and when we arrived, we heard meows coming from near her porch. She mentioned she had a wild litter and the kittens all needed a good home. We begged my dad to let us have one, and he caved. We brought “Ack” home and life was never the same again. I tried naming him Midnight and a few other names, but he never listened and my dad was constantly saying, “Ack! Ack!” trying to get him off the kitchen table, countertops, fridge, and everywhere else he wasn’t supposed to be–but inevitably was on a regular basis. Ack stuck, and we just called him that his whole life. He was the best damn cat too. You could hang him by his toes, and he’d just lay there hoping for belly rubs. He was indoor/outdoor cat, and he never made an accident in the house. I don’t think he even had a litter box now that I think about it. He got along great with our dog, a stray we found dumped on the highway. Those two animals taught me how to love at a time in my life when I didn’t feel comfortable talking to people or letting myself be vulnerable around people. I told all my darkest secrets, fears and heartaches to Ack and Tar, and loved me just the same. They followed my brother and me every where we went, and they had their own adventures together while we were at school. They both lived fairly long lives, but they both died by being attacked by wild animals, a mountain lion in one instance and wild dog or something by the other one. It’s tragic, but it’s also the cycle of life. They also taught me how to deal to death. My heart aches when I think of them being gone, and I still miss them, but I also treasure the memories we made, and I know they’re always in my heart.

Ok, so I loved both my dog and my cat equally, but for some reason, I wanted to be more like a cat than a dog. It could be the connection between cats and witches, and I always wanted to have magical powers to be able to turn into a cat, and dogs seem less mysterious and a little more predictable. That’s a totally unfair bias, but this is a subjective thing, and I love cats a little more than I love dogs. I think cats are more independent and sassy, and I can relate more to them. Bring on the puppies any day though, and it’ll absolutely melt my heart.

Wow, I have seriously digressed from the original question. Mission accomplished! I think? The purpose of these journal entries are to get me writing again and warmed up to write the first draft of my book in a few weeks, and I’m connecting with my inner voice, which means I’m not necessarily supposed to stay on topic, but rather, just write.

I seem to have distracted myself a bit though, so I’ll go back to keep it going.

Dragons! I love the movie, “How to Train Your Dragon,” because it’s everything I always imagined in a world with dragons. Of course you’ll have the more aggressive ones, but they’re all creatures who need love and companionship, and the fact they act like cats with wings is absolutely perfect in my mind. They’re playful, loving, feisty creatures who are curious and enjoying the wonders of nature. They sour through the skies, free as can be, and they are monstrous, yet graceful. They can breathe fire, live for centuries, and sleep for decades. They would also see the patterns in time, cultures, and technology, enjoying a different perspective on humanity and the world.

Flying is a dream I’ve always had. When i was young, I wanted to fly away from bad situations, but now I want to fly to discover. That’s what shows me how much I’ve healed and grown.




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